I had always wanted to create an Atari ST demo which featured a full pop song. Following a significant change in my personal circumstances, in early 2024 I finally decided to take the plunge and face my destiny! However, I had never even created a demo before, let alone one featuring a full pop song! My head spun with the possibilities of where to start.
I quickly ascertained that the first step of creating a demo is to choose what is known as a nick. A nick is a unique pseudonym that you adopt for your demoscene activities, and through which you release all subsequent work. Nicks are very important in the demoscene, as they allow other sceners to identify you quickly. This is especially helpful as it allows others to evaluate efficiently whether to be sycophantic, dismissive, straight-up unresponsive to you, or "pile in" on you in interactions on various demoscene forums.
Choosing a nick is a complex task. This is because there are many words in the English language to choose from. My first attempt involved taking an English dictionary and opening it with my eyes closed, before choosing a word at random via pointing to the page with my index finger. Unfortunately however this method did not bear fruit, as the first ten words I chose were all conjunctions or prepositions. Sadly, although conjunctions and prepositions do technically qualify as words, they are unsuitable for use as nicks and could even - worryingly - be confusing to other more established members of the demoscene.
My second strategy was more successful, and involved generating nick possibilities based around my real birth name, Jeff Caulk. This approach allowed me to develop quickly a shortlist of strong possibilities, and then weigh up the pros and cons of each in a systematic and rigorous manner.
My shortlist is below, with brief notes on each potential nick:
-- "Jeff": It is quite common to see "real" first names used as nicks. This is particularly common amongst self-conscious latecomers to the demoscene. Given my unequivocally middle aged status, I briefly considered doing the same. Soon however, I began to ruminate over whether my name is simply too linguistically plain for use in this way. I theorised that a linguistically plain nick could lead to my work being overlooked or forgotten. Even more catastrophically, I appraised a risk of my being confused with a more established scener, potentially leading to significant misunderstandings, recriminations and/or accusations. I quickly moved on.
-- "Caulker": My next experiment was with minor variations of my real surname. Through brainstorming with Scrabble tiles, I landed upon "Caulker" as a powerful potential candidate, featuring a linguistically rich and bold collection of back plosives climaxing in a delicate but forceful schwa vowel. However, my sense of triumph was short lived, as I then remembered with visceral shock that "caulk" has an existing meaning in English (a waterproof filler and sealant, used in building work). Because of this meaning, I identified a distinct possibility that "Caulker" as a nick would likely lead to me being erroneously contacted by members of the public seeking to commission minor domestic repairs. The mental load of managing such innocent but ultimately irrelevant enquiries would, in turn, sap precious time from the core business of demomaking. Therefore I swiftly eliminated this possibility from my shortlist, ensuring that I had crossed it out so firmly and decisively that no-one would ever be able to read it again.
-- "Chalk": Again based on my surname, I briefly considered other nouns which are morphologically close to, yet distinct from, my given name. For five blissful minutes, "Chalk" felt like it could be the answer to what was rapidly becoming a serious set of conundrums. However, I quickly concluded that the risk of my forgetting my own nick was high if I deviated from the "caulk" root, and moved on.
After a painful fortnight, my final decision on a nick was Caulky! A "slow grower", this name established itself as perfect: linguistically, it begins with the unadulterated pureness of my own given name, before elegantly shifting phonemically into a high-tongued and impactful vowel finale. These unique phonetic features combined to deliver a catchy yet capricious nick, with an ethereal hint of "summer vibes" as an aftertaste. Moreover and ideally fitting the famously apolitical theatre of the demoscene, there appeared no immediate controversies associated with the word. This significantly reduced likelihood of subsequent upsetting or aggressive interactions in online forums. Perfect.
There is, however, one point of learning from this experience, and therefore a single note of caution I must pass to any would-be sceners reading this mini-site instructionally: do ensure that you use a suitable search engine to check any associations around any potential nick prior to adopting it formally. Sadly, after the demo was released I was made aware that "Caulky" is coincidentally also the title of an apparently racy piece of popular adult fiction, openly available for purchase via major online retailers. I imagine that this matter may return to haunt me during future release cycles.
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| An unfortunate coincidence |
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